‘Erectile dysfunction’ is the modern term for ‘impotence’, which was deemed derogatory by some.
Whichever term is used to describe it, if you struggle with it you know how badly it affects you!
For men more so than woman, our self-esteem and sense of identity is easily affected by a lack of sexual performance.
There are a host of possible causes for erectile dysfunction:
- stress, anxiety or tiredness
- relationship difficulties
- smoking
- aging
- medicine (e.g. some anti-depressants)
- drug addiction
- physical deformity or other physical causes (e.g. spinal cord or brain injuries)
- excessive masturbation (e.g. porn) leading to an inability to get an erection during sexual intercourse
In a world where we live ever ‘faster’ and where instant gratification is available everywhere, it makes sense that millions of men head down the ‘Viagra’ route.
The problem is that drugs address the symptoms without ever resolving the root cause.
There’s a lot that you can do to help yourself right now; in fact, a lot more than you may think!
If you do this short exercise you’ll appreciate the role that emotions play with erectile dysfunction (as it does for most sexual difficulties):
- Close your eyes and remember the last time that you felt embarassed, ashamed or frustrated about being unable to get an erection; remember it in as much detail as possible, remember how you felt, and feel how that feels in your body right now.
- Now imagine a future time where you are about to have sex. Notice how the old feelings of the last time (when you couldn’t get or stay erect) carries over into the next time – only this time with added anxiety (fear that it may happen again) or an expectation you it will happen again; notice how that impacts your ability to relax and enjoy your sexual experience. Feel what that feels like in your body right now.
- Open your eyes, physcially stand up, look around the room and shake out your hands to shake off that energy; then sit down again and relax.
- Now – imagine a future time where you are approaching sex confidently, relaxed, feeling great about yourself and your partner; imagine being unable to have any worry or concern about your sexual abilities; notice how good that feels!
Even if you couldn’t totally imagine feeling confident, you would have noticed how distinctly different the first two visualiations felt from the last one.
The key is in how you feel about it; you feel feelings in your body, and the feelings in your body is hugely impacted by your body’s energy system.
Whatever the reason for you erectile dysfunction, your body’s energy plays a critical role in your sexual wellbeing. If you are like most men, Energy Psychology can very likely help you by firstly helping you release your painful feelings like shame or embarrament, disappointment and guilt about having the erectile dysfunction.
Quite often this is enough for men to step back into an enjoyable sex life!
Other men need to dig a little deeper and often that’s when we find a (seemingly unrelated) past event that’s causing the problem; a rejection (sexual or otherwise), the loss of a loved one or a job, a missed opportunity or dream or a perceived failure either in business or in your personal life. What is fascinating is that most men were totally unaware that a particular past event impacted them sexually – they just never saw the correlation!
And finally, the small number of men who, for whatever reason, do not overcome their erectile dysfunction, find that these techniques help them to accept themselves and their bodies and feel a whole lot better about themselves and about life.
But don’t take my word for it … click here for the solution.
